Labels

A couple of people have expressed concern about us moving forward with getting a diagnosis for Rowan, worried about having a label attached to him.

I worried about this myself for the longest time, which I think is why we have waited so long.  It is obvious to me that the "wait and see" period that was proposed by the two previous experts has passed, Rowan still is exhibiting some red flags, and we are standing in the middle of a crucial period of his development.

The first lucky thing is that Rowan has a summer birthday, so we have some bought time.  I can't even imagine Rowan being ready for kindergarten this fall.  He can't sit still, his emotional maturity has a long way to go, his social development is still developing, he can't and won't hold a pencil.  Luckily, he has one more year to figure out who he is and sort out how he fits into the world.  We have a year of opportunity to get him the help he needs for him to be ready for kindergarten when he does go.  A friend of mine, who has a child with autism, said, "Get the diagnosis and wield it like a weapon!" in response to a pretty unresponsive school district we were dealing with.  We still decided to wait and see.  Here is what I am afraid will happen now if we continue with with wait and see:

-Rowan will never learn how to appropriately ask another child to play.

-Rowan will not learn how to regulate his emotions and have temper tantrums (which have included violence lately) into his school age years.

-Rowan will continue to struggle with handwriting and fine motor activities, making school more frustrating.

-He will continue to invade other people's spaces, yell in their faces, make weird noises and push their buttons.

-Rowan will not develop longstanding friendships

-Rowan's teachers will not understand him

Here's what it comes down to:  if WE don't give him the label and get him the help he needs right now (continued speech/language therapy, occupational therapy, perhaps some counseling for his mom and dad), this behavior will continue into his school years.  Then it will be the KIDS who give him the labels:  That weird kid who doesn't know how to play with us.  That scary kid who freaks out and throws and hits.  The kid who has no friends.

I will do anything it takes right now to stop that from happening.  So I am.