One thing I learned about this year that has been very useful to me is writing (drawing) social stories. Social stories are a visual way of teaching appropriate behavior to people who are on the autism spectrum. They can be very simple, or pretty elaborate. The ones I write at school for the little dude I work with are like little comic strips. I have gotten quite good at drawing them and wording them so steps are broken down in simple, concrete terms. I've written one called "My Friend Needs to Fix Her Pants" (a classmate had a low-rise pants situation going on, apparently very upsetting....), another called "My Classmate is Bothering Me" (how to ask nicely for someone to stop,) and I've even written one called "What Do I Do With These Boogers?" (Rather than the harvest-and-snack situation we had going on.) Coworkers ask me to draw them for their on-the-spectrum kids all the time.
Three weeks ago, while talking to the OT about Rowan and his tough behavior, she asked, "Have you ever heard of social stories?" I just laughed. Turns out, a social story in the form of a picture schedule, to help Rowan with bedtime/morning routines, was her prescription. I was skeptical. How could this thing I do every day, staring me right in the face, be the help we need? Does that make Rowan autistic if he needs the autism supports? I took the idea home, I tried it. It worked. A bedtime with no tears or huge fits. Dan walking out of the house with Rowan in the morning rather than dragging him out kicking and screaming.
I mused about this later with Tahirih from my favorite Scottish Rite Clinic. Stating that I thought the situation between work and home was ironic, she reworded it for me. "No," she said, "I'd say the universe has been pretty generous to you." And she is right. I would have been several steps behind if not for what I have had to learn in my job this year. I've griped a lot to friends about not being able to teach art this year. Once again, what do I know? God always gives you exactly what you need. Tahirih also reassured me, just because he needs the autism supports doesn't give him that label. He is neurologically similar enough, that this just works for him.
The second part of this story has to do with today. While I have been using the visual schedules and they have been helpful, that is the extent to which I have used them. We are still struggling with meltdowns, tantrums and explosive/violent behavior. Enter Dr. Kidd, the behavioral consultant who came to our house today. We had a nice visit. Rowan engaged with her right away and was playing and flirting with her. We discussed possible triggers behind his meltdowns. She was feverishly jotting down notes while somehow still managing to stay focused on us. She suggested an interesting tactic for Rowan's tantrums. Usually, when he has one, we name his emotion "Rowan is MAD!" and then pretty much restrain him until he's calm enough to talk about it. She recommended going back to drawing social stories. Modeling an example for me, she looked for an opportunity for me to say no to him so we could try it. Rowan wanted lotion. I said no. He started flinging things and hitting me. She handed me her clipboard. I drew Rowan's mad face "Rowan is MAD." (He stops screaming.) I drew the lotion bottle. "Rowan wants lotion and mommy says no!" (He is interested in the pictures.) I crossed out his mad face and the lotion. "No lotion now." (I can feel his body calming.) I drew a train. "Rowan can play trains now." I drew a happy face. "That will make Rowan happy." Rowan stood up and went downstairs to his trains. I looked at Dr. Kidd in disbelief. She grinned.
So, it looks like I'll be in my social story practice for a while. A notebook in every room, in the car, in my purse. Eventually, his little brain will start making the connections and we should need them less. (I hope.) I think I have drawn about 15 so far on this unstructured day. Dan will also need to practice his drawing skills.
Other things I got from our visit today: look into a 504 plan for getting Rowan accommodations at preschool next year despite not qualifying for special ed services. Don't rule out autism, particularly Asperger's. (I don't like this one...but I can't ignore it either.) Rowan's language is AMAZING (she kept saying that!) Play deep pressure "squish" games with Rowan. Get a mini-trampoline. More resources being sent my way.
I have, for a while, been a little concerned about work being "too close to home." With the addition of more of these supports, it's getting under my skin a little. And I know it's going to get harder before it gets easier. I've just got to keep on keepin' on. And my next post will be funny. Promise.
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